“I’m at the point where i can go from feeling so much to so little in an instant. My emotions are all disarray. I feel like my veins are pumping potential energy, heart beat-beat-beating in anticipation for all the things that are about to happen in my life.
Growing up is weird. I’m learning and changing and evolving and it doesn’t feel like summer that passes and it’s August and you’re wondering where all the time went… every day i feel time whizzing past; if the hands on the clock rotate any faster it’ll fly off my desk and out the window.
I am so many things, and I’m training my eyes to find possibility in every second, to not let time get away from me, to not let myself live in a time that hasn’t even come yet. There is so much i want to do, so much i want to see, so much i want to create, so much i want to be.
I’m chasing light and I’m discovering who i am and what i want to do and how i want to live and I’m aching to praise my God with every breath.”
– Eighteen years poetry Madisen Kuhn
This is one of her many poems in the book that is deep and carved with depth. Every second you breathe, you are alive. Show gratitude and be thankful for what you have in your hands- Life. And if you are broken, you will mend and you will heal. Be it broken hearts or broken bones, you will move on and become stronger than you were before.
some of us may be told that we are a bunch of (hopeless) fucked ups and when you think about it, it takes a fucked up to identify a fellow fucked-up. We are all fucked up in our own unique ways, the ability to fuck things up is what makes us human. It’s embedded in us like an identity, both you and me too. That’s the wicked reality setting that we are born in.
“How’s you and Mark? You guys are so sweet.”
This is a belated thing that just popped into my mind which a friend asked me recently. We are not so sweet. There are down times. In fact if there’s no bad days at all, the relationship is almost fictitious. The good and bad days coexist.
We are not a couple full of sweetness that gives outsiders emotional diabetes. Speaking of sweetness, there are some people who “advertises” their relationship with farting rainbow bunnies (not literal) daily on Instagram, that is sugar overload. It’s alright to have a lot of love & affection for each other but is it really necessary to proclaim your love daily on social media? There are other means in showing your love right? (No intention to insult/offend any one out there, it’s just my opinion)
Mark and I have our fair share of bad weather days.We weather through the bad times, we enjoy through the good times. And to be honest, bad days plays an important part. It’s through the bad days i am more ascertain of what i want in the relationship, in myself, in him and also what i need to work on (though i admit i am a stubborn snail taking baby steps). And because we are in a LDR, it’s a little harder & longer to resolve our problems because we don’t get to physically to talk it out. Communication has to be done through our mutual best friend- SKYPE. So no, we are not so sweet at all. We are just a boring couple who is going through the LDR cycle right now. Not easy but not alone & step by step.