crestfallen on the sidewalk

It feels like fate has already been set for me. Transfer course because my current course is going to extinct this year? Yea, two more years to go. Ah tertiary life is a joke, or rather mine. I don’t know how to continue on like this. I am trying to convince myself to believe this is part of the path set for me, the only consolation i deserve.


Every one of us is worrying about different things. One is worrying about achieving first class. Another is worrying about achieving second class upper. The list continues. And me? Honors Class position really doesn’t matter to me. I am worried about whether i am able to finish the whole course safely in one piece.I must fulfill the promise i made to myself and to my Mom- Complete tertiary education. No matter how far the finishing line is , no matter how long it takes to complete the marathon, i need to complete it.

I am on the sidewalk of lampposts that have began to flicker. This is not a test. This is not a drill. This is happening. The insomnia, the aching of the stomach, the gray thoughts. The streak of bad days have began. I am not emotionally prepared for this. Absolutely not.




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