Reality check

didn’t make it for today’s paper despite spending the entire afternoon mugging yesterday😔. I know i will still fail after looking at the question paper that HB sent. But well… It’s okay, i will keep the studying momentum alive after this weekend of recuperation.

Hang in till the end of May, Sheryl. Close your eyes, breathe and you make it through. 

Finally reluctantly dragged myself to see the doc. Flu med, cough syrup, vitC and throat swelling med. blahblah. My life evolves heavily around medications every single day. Sigh pie, but i am moving slowly away from the sleeping pills. 

Hugs to V for attempting two prelim papers. She deserves more than just a pat. ❤️ Depressive like us stick together as a team and not let other moron buttheads who don’t understand to demean / hurt us. It’s not worth it.

It’s okay to be upset, it’s okay to be ourselves. It’s okay to feel pain. Because pain demands to be felt. But no, it’s not okay if we have to trade in our health and well-being for others’ to use unkind tactless hurtful remarks to rub it on our faces. 

I give up explaining to friends who  doesn’t get what depression is and don’t bother to look up on google and understand more about such issues. If only it hits them and they will understand the pain of the struggle, the pain of just staying alive. 

It’s up to them to how much they want to care, to understand. i don’t care what they expect out of me. Because at the end of the day, what they define and what they think of depression doesn’t define me nor define my struggles of my depression.

Everyone deals their depression differently and their depression triggered due to different factors and situations. It’s not the same for every individual out there. 

Sure, similar demons but different level every single day. 

Right here right now, i am just thankful i have genuinely caring friends and boyfriend to count on. Those who decides to leave and not turn back, they are free to go. I wouldn’t hold them back. Never will. 

x

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