About to get fix 

i’ve finally set an appointment to see my psychiatrist next monday (after much hesitance and reluctance). 

Been suppressing those unhappy , unhealthy & uncomfortable thoughts . I tried to numb everything and feel stoic through the week. 

I kinda imaginating how much stuff will i unload to my doc about, probably a lot more since it’s been months since i last visited. 

Plus i feel more comfortable with Mom not coming along (i didn’t tell her when i am going). No mother wants to hear her daughter having suicidal thoughts right? 

I know i have worried her and my family enough. I feel useless and being a letdown too many times.

I hope my doc will also prescribe other medicine for me- new friends since the old friends are not exactly working for me, especially Atarex. 

Need to swerve my mood and emotions back on recovery track. Slowly. And hoping the anxiety and paranoia will minimise along the way. 

I an a long term worrier , sigh. 

School load is getting heavier. I am still not managing my daily revision well. I am plagued by the complexity of the contents & being a slow (& forgetful) learner makes it worse. 

I need more time and i need better (smarter) brain cells . 

x

Advertisements

One thought on “About to get fix 

  1. I get what you mean!! Internally processing all these mania get a all our energy used up. It gets so hard to focus. I can relate so much! And with the exam stress it isn’t cool at all. Good luck to you. I wish for you to get stronger. ❤❤

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s